Today, I had an appointment with Falco Jansen at 12:30. On advice from my mom, I left about 20 minutes earlier than usual... I arrived half an hour early. Oh well, it's better than being late (like the last time). Traditionally, I was less nervous on my way there (I don't even call it anxious anymore), but I was still a bit nervous when I was talking to Falco (nothing serious though).
We discussed what direction we should be moving on from this point. He suggested that I continue session at another office where they specialize in ADHD, because the diagnosis seems pretty clear. It appears my psychiatrist (Victor Lunsden) suggested to take a detailed psychology test, but Falco thinks that'd be a waste of time. Falco expressed that he and Victor are glad they didn't start medication quite yet, because it seems to be going better now, and because the depression and anxiety attacks don't seem to be the core issue, but rather a result from another disorder (ADHD) in combination with my lifestyle and traumas from the past. I couldn't agree more.
He suggested we have one more (closing) session in a month form now, but I said I didn't want to wait that long (I do wanne go to school again after the summer). We set an appoitment for July 2nd at 14:45.
After this session with Falco, I felt really relaxed. I got on the bus, and wasn't really nervous at all. Heck, I didn't even feel like getting off the bus because I was sitting rather comfortably. I decided to stay on the bus, thinking it would go to Central Station. After a few stops past the stop where I usually get off, I noticed it had quite different plans. I got out, and decided to take a walk, heading into town.
After a 20 minute walk or so, I arrived in the centre, and Decided to go shooping for CDs and (computer) games. First, I went to Media Markt where I saw a special tour edition of David Bowie's Reality album, which includes a bonus DVD. The excelent part is—though it's still slightly expensive (about 20 euros)—it's cheaper than the regular edition that I saw at other record stores before. Then I visited Free Record Shop which had a very nice facelift, but I didn't find anything there. Plato (which was the next on the list) did have some nice things, but most of it was far too expensive (as usual). I noticed all three record shops had a lot of Bowie specials and limited editions. Nice.
Since I didn't score
in the music area, I decided to try my chances in gaming. I went to Gameshop where I had been pondering whether I should get House of the Dead III and two laserguns for Xbox after my previous visit to Parnassia. I don't know whether it were my question that I had layed upon them back then, but now they suddenly had a special offer: Buy one lasergun; get House of the Dead III for free.
!
I'll have one of those, please.
After this nice score
I hung around at a local bookstore, drooling over some nice art and graphic design books, but didn't feel like bringing anything home with me. At this point, I had been wandering around for probably hours, and had absorbed all kinds of things, but one part of me was feeling empty—still—being my stomach. I stuffed myself with a patatje oorlog
at 't Kleintje Winkeltje and a broodje kroket (ouderwets)
at Dungelman. I was about as content as one can get.
Stuffed and loaded, I took a slow pass towards my homecourt. When I got there, Enrique and a bunch of kids from the neighborhood were already there. I don't know what was the matter with Enriqueand myself, but it was like we had been smoking all sorts of stuff all day. We didn't have energy worth shit (like, really—I had trouble carrying a basketball, let alone throw it), and we appeared out of our minds; making stupid jokes, talking to everybody, laughing about everything and acting like three year olds. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that we played intense basketball for about 8 hours straight in the burning heath without eating anything yesterday.
The kids in the neighborhood picked up on our behaviour, and joined in the fun. I'm not going to go in detail from this point on, but I used the swing, fell on the ground in the proces of catching a guy that we wanted to put on some roundgoing thing (at which we succeeded—he got nauseous and went to bed), I got a water balloon thrown at me, and... wait, I said I wasn't going into detail...
A fun day. Weird, but fun.